Thursday, September 11, 2008

oh - i've been meditating after all?

Originally posted Wednesday, May 31, 2006

i used to think it was impossible for me to meditate cuz my perception of meditation was going totally inside my head, blocking out all exterior noises and "talking" to god or whatever. so i said, "I can't do that, but i do just sit and contemplate."

duuuUUUuuuh. come to find out, that's all meditation is. contemplation. just sitting still and letting my thoughts and feelings go wherever they wanna. but not THINKING - you know, not daydreaming or worrying something or making lists. it's recognizing thoughts as they pop up, pushing them aside and going back to just listening to everything in and around me. heartbeat. breathing. people within earshot. birds. cars driving by. cattle lowing. dogs barking. children down the street. airplanes overhead. all of it.

i have realized meditation is, for me, kind of like listening to a symphony. where i can listen to the sound as a whole or i can lightly focus to single out a specific instrument while still enjoying the whole. at the same time, i absorbe but disregard all other ambient sound. but i don't think about it. i gently squash or set aside any coherent thoughts when i listen to music choosing, instead, to simply immerse myself in the deliciousness of the complexity of sound. no wonder music makes me feel so wonderful. i've been meditating all these years! *eyeroll*

so - if meditation and not-mainstream-faith or -spiritual or -religious practices wig out whoever you share your life with, you can accomplish meditation by simply curling up on the couch, putting on some yummy, soothing music and closing our eyes or gazing out the window. the other person(s) will think you're daydreaming or just "getting into the music" when what you're really doing is the daily ritual of maintaining your spirituality and the health of your body and soul. i've done this while traveling on a train. i'm sans music, but gazing out the window is a great way to meditate and folks generally leave me undisturbed when i appear to be "wool gathering." give it a whirl. it sure can't hurt anything. and do it once or twice a day!

Prayer, Spells, Positive Thinking, Magic, Intent, Wishes....

Originally posted Thursday, April 13, 2006
what are these things to you? here's what they are to me: they are all the same thing simply in different words depending on the context and/or belief system of the person using them. since i live in a mostly christian community i use the word prayer most often. but i'm a witch. witches don't pray!! they do spells!!! hmf.

ok - i "do a circle" then i "talk to god" then i "conjure" with chants, incense, candles and water. when a christian - only as an example folks - goes into a church, it is actually the same thing as my "doing a circle." we are both entering into sacred space. christians talk to god individually, collectively or passively when they listen to the priest. they commune amongst the congregation and, in some christian churches, incense is lit, chanting is done, water is sprinkled or dipped into and favors are asked of god (spells are cast). we are not so different, really. in fact, EVERYone who focuses their thoughts and bends their intent upon something is doing "magic."

how many times have we heard the saying, "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it." and how many times have we heard, "If you really think about it, it'll happen" or "dreams come true." wishing, prayer, magic, idle daydreaming, spells, positive thinking, intent - whatever you want to call it, is the concentration of our thought, individually and/or collectively, and people - wishing a thing were so DOES make it happen. the proof of the power of prayer as people focus their intent on the well-being of this person or another surrounds us everywhere. look to the newspapers for stories of miracles. scour the internet and you will see how people who have asked for prayer intervention have been given what is most dear to their hearts.

the power of thought is a tangible and real thing and many of us make the mistake, in my opinion, of thinking what goes on in our heads is private. it is not. i have, over the last couple decades, trained my mind to think in positives, have taught myself to couch my sentences in positives, not negatives, reclaimed my lost naivete and innocence by insisting on trusting first until taught otherwise and have seen my life change from being harmed or in chaos to peace, laughter and joy practically every moment of every day. this is all possible because i wished and prayed to become a kinder more compassionate person. i focused my thoughts and applied positive thinking toward achieving that goal. a goal i am still seeking and always will strive for. i have seen with my own eyes the power of positive thinking in simple things like asking for a parking spot right up front on days i'm not feeling well and have to go into town. it works every time. i sail through town hitting green light after green because i've "cast a spell" or said a prayer asking for freewheeling. when hunting, i have asked for fine bucks and have always been presented with prime specimens pleasing to my gods, but some were not old enough to harvest by our laws. i have sent prayers of strength winging on candle flames and seen them answered.

so tell me. are these words variations on a theme to you or do they hold different meanings or perceptions?

Who does this corporeal life benefit?

Originally posted Thursday, April 13, 2006

me? someone else? both?

here's my take.

sometimes someone is born into this world not for his or her benefit but to fulfil the needs of another. for example, those sweet spirits who were stillborn or, like my five children who only survived in the womb for the first 10 weeks before leaving, might be classified as one of these giving souls. such short lives did not benefit my children (i think), but they did have a substantial impact on me. i also believe the 14th Dalai Lama is such a person. he is not here to learn, but to teach. to assist. to help influence mankind toward a more harmonious existence.

i have a debilitating illness: fibromyalgia (FMS), sister to lupus and chronic fatigue. i have good days and i have bad days. but i do understand that my life was staged - by me - before i was born. i chose my parents to set that stage. their genetics, the environment they lived in, family dynamics were all factors. i may or may not have developed the FMS depending on the choices i made as i matured. but somewhere along the line in this corporeal existence, i missed what i was supposed to understand so the FMS kicked in. me - as sunni - i never would have voluntarily chosen this dis-ease. but Me - as my eternal Self - i factored this into this lifetime to accomplish something.

what? and for whom?

well, over the last decade i've slowed down a lot. this dis-ease has allowed me to see things from a different perspective. it has taught me i can be in so much pain i cry and yet i can still be in a good mood and thankful for everything around me. this dis-ease has also helped me to help others understand they should not feel guilty when they can no longer do those things they used to do because FMS - or plug in whatever they may have - really does make it impossible. that they are not being lazy, they really can't get up and go anymore. this dis-ease has also helped my wife to become more tolerant and to live more in the Now. she laughs more and we play more, albeit more quietly than we did as younger women. i have learned with this dis-ease to give myself permission to put something off until tomorrow and to seize the day when i have the energy.

those are the little things. i cannot even begin to explain how both my wife and i have grown spiritually because of my dis-ease. i have learned that this dis-ease is here for a reason and, quite surprisingly, it is more for the benefit of others than for me, i think. i have learned it is just as blessed to receive as it is to give. it is important to empower others by allowing them to do for me. which, by the way, means i am actually giving them something by allowing them to give to me. i have learned to take delight in gifts from others without guilt or embarrassment because it also pleases the giver and makes them a better person as well. i've learned that by simply doing what i can and existing with the joy of life i have learned, that i touch others' lives and have a positive impact on them. just because i live and breathe.

now, in my belief system, we are One with everything. what i do to me i do to you. if i am unkind to someone, i cause them harm. by doing so, i also cause harm to the cosmos, to the flowers, to the fish at the bottom of the sea, to the murderer, to the woman with seven HIV positive children in africa, to the asteroids circling our galaxy and right on to everything that exists. this ripple of negativity changes the overall "tone" of this pool of Oneness. so when i apologize and rectify my unkindness, love, relief and happiness are fed into this pool of Oneness and once again changes the "tone." what does this have to do with who benefits from my pain-riddled existence? everything.

because we are One, we choose to live on this planet in one of the millions of life forms available so All can learn and grow and understand. in this body, i have learned i cannot truly understand the joys of warmth unless i experienced being miserably cold. i learned, thru that of yin and yan. how dark and light are opposite sides of the same coin. how love and hate, laughter and tears are both necessary to truly understand the Love we are all a part of when we listen closely enough to consciously connect with our Oneness. because we are corporeal, what we learn, whether it is hideous violence or deep happiness, it is all factored and absorbed for the betterment of the Whole, the One, the All. the seperateness we embody in these life forms is essential to the learning experience and is no illusion to me. in my opinion, there is no illusion at all either in this life form, on another plane or after the death of this corporeal being. it is all real. the very essence of seperateness these bodies give us is what draws us to these lives in the first place. by embracing our senses, the perceptions of this corporeal existence and combining that with an earnest search for manifesting love and Love in each short lifetime we help not only ourselves but everyone and everything. in truth, we really are our brothers' keeper.

so. who does this corporeal life benefit? me. you. the bugs. this world. the universe. The One.

So! What about those gods....?

Originally posted Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Being a hedgewitch, I'm connected to numerous gods - entities - around the clock. I speak with them, They speak with me in various ways and we play and work together frequently throughout my waking period. The gods do definitely have senses of humour. And I muse on them frequently. I can tell when I've come to a clear understanding on my own and it meets with His/Her/Their approval or when one of Them slips a truth - as They know it - into my head. It has come to my understanding over the last 2-3 years the gods are not omniscient nor are they omnipotent. They are, like these bodies we wear, indigenous to this planet. They are also as long lived as our Mother Earth, Gaia. *whew* In human terms, that's practically immortal! The only God not indigenous is The Source, The All, The Well of Wyrd, The One. That which we all came from, are going to and are with now until the end of Time and beyond. Kinda like the Christian God - S/He/It is everything. As quoted to Moses, "I am that I am." The Source is Male. It is Female. It is neither yet it is both. It simply IS. But I digress. It's the local gods I speak of today. The "supernatural" beings like Djinn, demons, fairies, sprites, gnomes, little people, god/desses, spirits and/or deities..
Back a hundred years ago, when I was between the ages of 10 and 25 I was most familiar with Christian traditions and faith, I would scratch my head and shake it in wonder how the Romans and other civilizations could be so irreverent about their gods. How they could give their gods human foibles, weaknesses and feelings. *slapping forehead* Well duh. They're "people" of this planet just like anyone/thing else. Of course they're like us!.
Gaia, a living entity in His/Her/Its own right, is host to millions of species in, on and above the surface in all sizes from microbial to elephants in those species we can see and all kinds and sizes in those we can't see. There are good and bad among all species - some more and some less aggressive or passive of their species. Take a pack of baboons and watch the interplay. There are distinct personalities among the pack. You have the alpha male and female, the two most robust, intelligent, healthy and confident pair in the pack. You also have the other end of the spectrum with the weakest, not so smart runt and that one is constantly picked on, pushed aside and always last to eat because s/he lacks confidence, strength and aggression to be assertive. Now look closer to home. Watch a flock of birds. The same pecking order (pun intended) applies. Now look IN the home to the pets. If there is more than one pet in the household, there is going to be a pecking order. Each pet has a distinct personality. Pets like, dislike, love, hate, feel indifference, suffer depression, have bouts of ecstatic joy, mourn and adore. So does every other living organism on this planet, be it visible or not. I know for a fact plants do and that knowledge has nothing to do with science. I can directly communicate with plants. (yeah, yeah, I know. I sound like a loonie.) So - if fish, elk, bears, pets, bees, humans - well - all living things share the full range of emotion, then its a bit obvious the Djinn, demons, fairies, sprites, gnomes, little people, god/desses, spirits and/or deities do also. They are, after all, evolved locally like we are..
Among the species on this planet you will always have the rogues - the ones who act well outside the norm. In the human species this would be called a sociopath. As a "god" this would be called a demon - in my opinion. No - not a dark god or goddess, those are generally benevolent warrior-like beings like Kali. Demon. Hell-bent on chaos. And those among the demon's ilk: incubus, succubus, and any other ugly, foul-tempered spirits that plague us from beyond our mundane senses. I also know these guys exist from personal experience. (Long story for another day - maybe lifetime.) On the other end of the spectrum there are the truly enlightened like Mother Teresa and the 14th Dalai Lama. As a "god" this would be called an angel, a god/dess, a patron saint or something similar. Inbetween you have your normal, run-of-the-mill entities who are not quite as flamboyant as the sociopathic or angelic ends of the bell curve. They are also as varied as insects or fish or mammals. There are many different "nationalities" or "species" or "types" - whatever you want to pigeon-hole them into..
And like humans, each one has their own individual bag of talents. They are no more or less important than we are. Just like we are no more or less important than - say - an ant, or a mushroom. They are simply different. Like insects or eagles are different from us. But we are symbiotic. We need each other like dogs need people and vice versa. We operate better in concert and the world runs more smoothly - as a general rule - when we do. There are things only we can do and they cannot just as there are things they can do we can only dream of. Like manipulation of Time and events. They are the ones who manifest our every thought and whim. They rely on us to dream the stuff up. And - there is one thing these entities all have in common. They all love humans to one degree or another. Remember also, love can run the gamut from pure, unselfish, untainted caring to the deadly sickness of obsession and hatred..
With so many of these beings, how do we gain, avoid, retain or rebuff their attentions? How do we pick and choose, like we do our human circle of friends, who we have truck with? Well, we don't always. Sometimes they choose us and we have no choice. We have opened ourselves through our behavior or thinking, regardless of how young we are, in some way to make us vulnerable to negative energies and entities attaching to these bodies. Unkindness, harmful thoughts and/or actions, mean-spiritedness, greed, lust, hate, jealousy, envy, bitterness - all the negative thoughts and actions degrade our ability to ward off unwanted entities. Also the thrill of playing with "fire" with summonings, playing with the "occult" without proper protection or awareness, the association with deadly risk takers and wrong-doers also weakens our ability to protect ourselves. The mind is an incredible thing. Coupled with the Soul, the minds of the creatures on this planet are the only ones in the entire universe to manifest thought into actual matter, actual events, tangible results. So as we think, so we do. We think it, we will eventually act on it. As a result, if we keep right thoughts those will lead inevitably to right and pure action. Trust me on this one. It's really true. I went from a negative nelly to a fluffy-bunny witch over the period of just one decade and a clear, loving and joyful outlook really does make life a bowl of roses. It also pulls around me a natural ward rebuffing any negative entities who might look my way..
Yeah, yeah, you say. But what about picking and choosing? Well, shucks. That's as individual as you are. Some folks - like me - just wait for Someone to show up. Others study likely god/desses and pursue them. Others pray for divine intervention. It is my opinion the god/desses have been here long enough They know who They are. They have seen civilizations come and go, kingdoms and faiths rise and fall, ebb and flow, morph and adapt and evolve over the millenia from the earliest beginnings of this planet. This planet is small for ones who live so long and They have traveled every inch in, out and over it many, many countless times. So My Lady Cailleach (see ), for instance, is a dark goddess who is known by many names around the world as is My Lord Cernunnos/Herne (see ), nie the Lord of the Hunt, found in many variations and aspects as each civilization around the world required. I can't really tell you how to find the god/dess(es) who will walk with you. I can tell you how I found mine.
I knew from earliest memory I was watched over by a female deity and maintained that knowledge faithfully, no matter how I cast about looking for who She may be. My Lady did not make Herself known to me until I was in my 50s. I simply believed in Her, figuring She knew who She was and She would show up when I had a need to know or when I was finally mature enough to appreciate Her fully. As for My Lord, again I operated on simple faith. I knew there was a Lord of the Hunt, a King of Animals so I petitioned Him knowing He would assist me. I did this for three years running as I stepped into the woods to hunt deer. He always presented me with a beautiful gift, but one year in particular He decided to step forward and let me know He was the male god who has always watched over me. I have known of His presence also since earliest memory. I have also made friends with other dieties, calling on this one or that to tap their unique talents for this quest or that and have become playfully comfortable with Father Sky in all His moods. It's been just that. A simple matter of believing with no shred of doubt. They're as much there as the air we breathe. I don't have to see the air to know it is always there to sustain me. I also know I must take care what I put into the air or it will no longer be able to sustain me. And so the symbiosis goes. As with our environment, so it is with the Djinn, demons, fairies, sprites, gnomes, little people, god/desses, spirits and/or deities. We cohabit this little ball of life suspended in a HUGE void. We are brothers and sisters, we are their equals and we need each other to insure one another's survival.

Hunting Season and Natural Attrition

Originally posted Friday, October 14, 2005
In the United States we have hunting seasons to help us sensibly manage flocks and herds of those birds and animals we share our continent with. Both hunting associations and tree huggers research and study the environments, propose and implement improvements and manage the populations so they are optimal for everyone involved. Not an easy task, but the dedication of the people involved and the success they achieve is a testament to Mankind’s love for His fellow creatures and the planet we live on. Yet, it is sad we should even have to do so.

Millennia ago, population size was achieved through natural attrition. The sick and the weak were weeded out if they were unable to recover enough health and strength to keep up with the rest of the population and remain a contributing member. Only those with the best attributes were the breeders so the continued evolution and improvement of the species was insured. Our planet evolved with delicate and intricate checks and balances. If a herd - say of deer - were to become too robust, they would not be able to survive in their environment because there would not be enough food for everyone. When hunger sets in, it causes changes in the body, weakens many of the animals and the immune system degrades. Illness becomes wholesale throughout the herd, starvation takes its toll, many are harvested by predators because they are unable to escape and the herd is brought back down to a manageable size. Only those strong enough to survive will remain to heal and perpetuate the herd. As the herd weakens and thins, the environment heals and once again produces sustenance. Balance is achieved once again and, in two or three years, the herd and the land live in harmony.

There is one animal where this law of natural attrition is no longer allowed. Mankind.

As we evolved from ancient ancestors to modern man, born of predator inheritance, we learned to manipulate our environment to a much greater degree than our fellow creatures. Our intelligence allowed us to look at things differently than the others and so we inspected, studied and experimented with our environment. Thus we learned to change the environment to suit us instead of being at the mercy of our surroundings. We built protective shelters, draped ourselves with protective clothing, learned to plant the foods and husband animals compatible to us so there was more than what was found naturally. As a result, our species thrived. And burgeoned. When we grew too many in one area, we moved into another where we implemented the improvements favorable to our kind and we thrived again. And burgeoned. And grew too many and moved on again. As the millennia have ground on, we have continued to manipulate our environment in more inventive ways to insure the health and welfare of Mankind and have become so many we have put our world out of balance.

Watching educational television, we learn from an early age Balance is a precious and complicated necessity to insure the survival of not just one species, but all species. Destroy the rain forest in South America and you remove the largest source of oxygen provided for the entire planet. Wipe out an entire species of wolf in the arctic region and the herds are not trimmed, therefore the land is overrun and the plants are unable to hold up to the harvesting. The plants become rare, the insect population is thrown out of balance. The change in insect population causes birds to starve and other plants, requiring those insects for pollination, thin and disappear. By improving our environment we have improved our lot and, as a result, we are healthier, smarter, larger, more numerous beyond what our natural environment can support. As a result, our improvements and changes to our environment have thrown others out of balance and our own survival dictates we must step in and manipulate the environment for the others now to insure their survival and well being. We must be responsible and find ways to insure the rest of our world does not suffer with out continued growth.

Yet, our world is finite. There is only so much room. We are becoming a monoculture, displacing other species and environments at an alarming rate. People who would not have lived a mere century ago now do because of the advances we have made in the medical field. Swarms of people survive because we have learned to build up toward the sky, we have manipulated the hybridization and even the very genetics of plants and animals so we can maximize them to feed the still burgeoning human population. We are becoming too heavy for the planet we live on. More people require more plants and animals to feed us. More plants and animals require more land. More land displaces more species.

So - man developed a hunting season for his own kind. It is called War.

The strong, the smart and predominantly male members of the species are sent to battle against one another to establish territorial boundaries so each group has optimal land for the survival of their breed. It is the nature of our species, as with many others we share this planet with, to stake out a patch of land for the pride, herd, tribe, community - whatever you wish to call it - and defend that area from intruders. It is our animal instinct. We cannot escape our ancestry. We are the sum of everything and everyone who has gone before us. Thus we have what becomes the extended tribe: the nations. We are no longer mere communal predators. We are groups of communities spread out over entire continents now instead of mere acres or miles. As the hunters we were bred to be from the dawn of time, we war with one another, commit atrocities upon our own kind and subjugate the weaker of the species. Unfortunately, today in the twenty-first century, warring no longer thins our population. Even with the weapons we have for mass destruction, we cannot keep up with the increase in our numbers.

So our Mother Earth awakens and does what She must to insure Her own survival and for all of those for whom She provides for. Gaia has, over the last quarter century, provided more and more deadly and virulent diseases to help with the natural attrition our species should be subject to and to battle the more and more effective medications we manufacture to neutralize Her grand plan. Our kind still multiplies and lives longer. In the last decade, Gaia has begun to shake her skin. Storms more catastrophic each year. Earthquakes, eruptions, floods, infestations. She is washing and cleansing Herself as a person would remove ticks or lice to insure their own well-being. Hundreds, thousands and millions of living creatures are being removed with each shake. Tragedies of monumental proportion are witnessed - not just among humankind but plants, animals, insects and more - on a global scope.

Mankind must learn population control, just like we do when we declare hunting season on the animals and birds in the United States. War is becoming more and more abhorrent as Mankind evolves into a more compassionate being. War is becoming less and less an acceptable option. I foresee a time when hunting season on Mankind is gone altogether. We must insure the welfare of our planet and the welfare of all other species besides ourselves if we are to survive into the future millennia. We must, if we eventually succeed in eliminating predation on our own kind, find a way to limit our expansion in numbers to a size where we are not a monoculture, where we are not a burden any more on our Mother Earth. We must live in balance and harmony or we will perish. If we perish from over population and all the repercussions from such growth, we will take many - if not all - species with us and, quite possibly, Mother Gaia will also fail to thrive as well.

So ask yourself, “What can I do? How can I live more gently on this delicate planet? What changes can I implement in my life to help?” Look about you. Think of water conservation. Use less electricity. Recycle everything you possibly can. Repair things instead of throwing them away. Live so you throw away less. Use more biodegradeable products. Make your own if you can. Grow your own if it is within your ability. Care for others around you and help them to also achieve these things. Share. Trade. Barter. Use your inherited intelligence and creativity to see and improve your way of living to insure there is more for others and for tomorrow’s children - be they humankind or of another species. Live in joy and happiness seeking harmony within and around you. In this way, each and every person can begin a revolution of thoughtful, responsible and successful cohabitation. One person at a time. One person can make a difference and the change begins with you.

It's Not So Bad Being An Angel of Death

Originally posted Thursday, June 16, 2005

In fact, it has its decided rewards. Death is such a natural part of Life. Lessee, how many people have I escorted along their journey to the Summerlands? hmmm. Papa Bergeron (alzheimers), Uncle Steve (A.I.D.S.), Ed (brain cancer), Ma (emphesema), Mommy (alzheimers) and now Uncle Bill (alheimers) and Papa (lung cancer) are currently on their journey. All in the last quarter century. I have yet to see the birthing when the soul leaves the body. I have not been gifted with that honor yet. It is such a privilege to spend the last months, weeks, days or hours with someone who is going thru the end-of-Life experience. There is much I can do to aid them, to nurture those who are no longer able to do for themselves. The outpouring of unconditional love, the clarity of priorities, the dark and crazy humor, the insight into the past and the heart of the one making the journey.

For instance, when people start their journey to the Summerland, life is filled with a series of absolutely hysterical, macabre vignettes. It's kinda like raising children. They do the goofiest things.

So - I help out with the neighbor's Uncle Bill. He has advanced alzheimers. He has pretty much forgotten how to walk, so he's pretty much confined to his room. He has a hospital bed, one of those fancy motorized easy chairs that stands you up, a tv with a remote he battles with. There's one wall with windows, floor to ceiling shelves on the opposite wall and opposite his bed is the closet with two mirrored sliding glass doors.

A couple days ago while watching tv, Uncle Bill noticed the other guy in the room. *snort* So he's been keeping this fella company. Doesn't matter the guy doesn't answer back. He just chats along. Y'see, he "sees" himself as a much younger man, so he doesn't recognize himself in the mirror!!!Yesterday, when his neice went in to check on Uncle Bill, he jerked his thumb to point at his roomie and asked her, "Has he eaten yet?" Poor woman. I have no idea how she kept a straight face. She replied, "No. Would you boys like some lunch now?"

Alzheimers can be sad. But, like all end-of-life experiences, it can also be a time of fun. Once you get past the need for the person to be the same as they once were and understand that they are reverting back to their very basic personality, you can start to relax and have fun. I "lost" my mom about a decade before she journeyed to The Summerlands from alzheimer's related problems. It took me a couple years to finally give the Mom I once knew up and discover the enchanting child she was becoming. Once I reached that point, we had a lot of fun together. The only time it was truly sad was during those flashes of lucidity that catch you broadside. When the person you used to know peeks out and wails. What I remember from the last ten days of her life and hold most dear was when I asked her if she would like some pudding. Blessed child, her face lit up and she said, "Oh! I do so love pudding. Mommy only gives it to us for special occasions!!" "Well, Jo-Jo, what flavor would you like?" coquettishly, she looked at me and giggled. "Why, chocolate, of course. Could anything possibly be better?" *sigh* I miss both my mommies. The one who raised me, and the one I tended as she declined.

Meanwhile, Uncle Bill is oblivious and his flashes of lucidity are getting further apart. Barb, his nephew's wife, is learning to relax and accept him as he is each day. I've been able to help her realize playing with him and seeing the humor in what he does will increase his longevity and introduce her to the dear child this man was when he was somewhere between two and five years old. And he is a delightful little rascal. His nephew, John, is just there. He and Uncle Bill have always played together in that manly way a favorite uncle and favorite nephew do. It's a special bond and a beautiful thing to see. John has the patience of job with Uncle Bill.

During the journey to the Summerlands, many people re-experience events decades gone. Folks who don't deal with end-of-Life much chalk it up to hallucination or good drugs. But it is not so. It is a form of Time Travel. They truly are regressing and really are experiencing those events just as if they are really there. And who's to say they're not there? Time is only linear while we are wrapped up in these bodies and are dealing with Ego and Id. Once we let go (astral projection, dream, meditation), time is no longer linear. We can be anywhen as well as anywhere. From the end-of-life experiences I’ve been privileged to share, I have found this time travel to be as real as my current, mundane, day-to-day life. It was during this time of my mom’s life she “visited” with friends and relatives who remembered vividly seeing her either in their dreams or out of the corner of their eyes during their waking hours.

When you get to the stage in Life where yesteryear is more real than today, it is a time of great beauty. These times are very short and extremely precious. This is a time when we must listen very carefully and participate in these experiences as much as possible. This is the only time we will ever come close to first hand experience of whatever era that person was young in as well as assisting this person to rework whatever it is they need to attend to. Also, there are no secrets during this time of life. This is when the scandals or the rest of the story come out and, if you're not ready for this honesty that slips out in snatches of mutterings and broken paragraphs, it can really tilt your world. I know. I've been faced with my mother's demons as she went into the hallucinatory stage of starvation and I had to rework and repair my evaluation of loved ones long gone. Attending someone's journey to the Summerlands is a gift rich with pain, joy, tears and laughter.

Be not afraid of this when you are with those close to the veil. They have, inevitably, relinquished their independence and their control over their lives and are now wandering through Time reworking, reliving and reviewing. Do not put yourself into their shoes as you will be there soon enough on your own. Instead, live utterly in the moment. Allow yourself to completely sink into the pool of bittersweet happiness that comes during this stage of life. By sharing in their reality completely, you receive such a gift of love and they receive the dignity they deserve. I once feared losing control and becoming a burden and have since realized it is inevitable we will become dependent upon others. It is a natural part of Life. As our bodies decline, our minds revert back to more pleasant times and, if we let ourselves, we can toss aside those things we can no longer do for ourselves and enjoy the freedom of childhood we have longed for ever since we grew up. This is a gift to us. This is the silver lining on the cloud of our tiring bodies.
And think: are we truly a burden? Look to those who work in Hospice where they tend those on their journey to The Summerlands or those people who volunteer to care for others afflicted with alzheimer’s disease. Can you honestly say the people they tend are really a burden? Look closely into the staff who support these people, who love them, who love being there with them, who care for them so tenderly even as they grump? This time of life when the elders become childlike and childish again is important. There are those of us who need to nurture those who once nurtured us, to give back in return. I honestly can't say losing control is such a bad thing. And believe me - I am a control freak.
Think of the gift of doing for others - where you can make something happen for someone who is unable to do for themselves. Like - oh - giving someone you meet a $20 bill for gas when they're flat broke and lost. Or fix that bicycle for the neighbor kid. Or get that bag of groceries for someone who ran out of food stamps. It's a good feeling being able to do for someone. But - just as important - one must learn to receive such gifts with equal joy. For by allowing others to do for you, you enrich your own life while you empower them and fill their need to provide. The door must swing both ways.
And so - we come into this world helpless and spend many years growing, running free and learning. Then we nurture and provide for the bulk of our lifetime here on this planet. Then - it is our reward to once again achieve the freedom and responsibility-free time at the end of our life so we can come full circle and completely open ourselves up to Spirit. Remember, Jesus saying something along the lines about, "come to me as a child..." *smile*

Luke 18:15-17[15] People were also bringing babies to Jesus to have him touch them. When the disciples saw this, they rebuked them. [16] But Jesus called the children to him and said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. [17] I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."

Starting Over

well rats. it's been a couple years since i updated my old blog so it looks like i'll hafta repost those thoughts over to this one. just to letcha know, i really am a fluffy-bunny hedgewitch, so most of my personality truly is sunny. i am a joyful person, slow to anger, quick to laff. but even the most indomitable optimist has serious thoughts and controversial ideas. i present you my own opinions which are, of course, subject to change after intelligent discourse and new experiences. if you disagree, please don't flame and don't just say it's stupid. think about your reaction first. WHY does it make you angry? disgusted? thoughtful? shocked? and then let me know those reasons, please. none of my opinions are cast in stone and i welcome dialog with anyone who wishes to go toe to toe in non-angry and sincere debate.